Part 3: From Results to People
Having Difficult Conversations
You are pacing the floor, palms clenched and sweaty, trying to come up with an excuse not to have the conversation. But as leader of the team, you know there are things that need to be said to your team member and they must come from you. But this is the last thing you want to deal with right now. Why do people issues always come in the way of getting the job done?
The results focussed leader
Results focussed leaders focus on tasks not people. They understand that the most effective and efficient way to realising success is to direct the what, when, who and how and oversee that it gets done on time and in budget. If anyone steps out of the tight boundaries set, they are admonished, re-directed and reapplied. High-performance is secured by the leader applying the following communication protocols:
· Demands are clear, concise and task-orientated;
· Questions limited to agreed times and must be specific and relevant;
· Closed door means closed to emotion;
· No problems, just solutions.
When it comes to having a difficult conversation, therefore, the results focussed leader does this:
1. Focuses on performance – considers people and events secondary to fixing the gap between failed task and task completion;
2. Provides direct feedback - usually focuses on the negatives and what has to change;
3. Restates performance expectations – sees primary route to resolution to be clarity on standards and quality of effort required; and
4. Creates action plan to get back on track – often, pre-determined and without opportunity for discussion.
This leader has resolved personnel issues by parachuting in, to trouble-shoot, course-correct and solve. Success is back on track and the team member has learnt what not to do. Or have they?
The conscious leader
The results focussed leader achieves high performance, but at the cost of learning. If we want to create a high-performing environment of inclusion and learning, we must give team members the opportunity to learn from their mistakes. We must create a ‘no blame’ culture that puts people front and centre of performance.
When having a difficult conversation to overcome an issue or challenge, the conscious leader does this:
1. Connects at human level – primary focus on the person, not the problem, and uses empathy to see the situation from their perspective.
2. Establishes open & non-judgemental dialogue – rather than jump to judgement or blame, uses open questions to explore and understand the problem and elicit ideas for overcoming and resolving the challenge.
3. Taps into desire for higher fulfilment – connects the person to their resourcefulness and capability to solve the matter, encouraging them to overcome hurdles and trouble-shoot for themselves.
4. Focuses on future action – asks them what they are responsible for doing next to achieve task completion, helping them to break it down into action steps that they are committed to doing.
The leader has effectively turned a difficult conversation into an opportunity to build a relationship. By stepping to the side of their team member, they have uncovered the problem from a different perspective and entrusted the team member to fix it for themselves. By showing them belief and trust, the team member connects to their belief and trust they have in themselves and learning flows.
When we accept that high performance is a journey of learning, difficult conversations become an opportunity for us to transform our team members from implementers to innovators, who learn for themselves.
If you want to take the courageous leap to being a Conscious Lawyer, reach out to find out more about C-Success Coaching at https://www.kiranscarr.com/coaching.